Wednesday, August 10, 2011

Polygamy

This conversation took place between B and me in the dark of his bedroom on December 23, 2009 (he was 7 yrs old), before he fell asleep:

B: I think it would be so cool if Nana was Mrs. Claus.
J: Why?
B: Because then she could take me to the North Pole and introduce me to Santa and show me the workshop anytime I wanted.
J: Well, if Nana was Mrs. Claus, then you wouldn't need to be introduced to Santa. You'd already know him - Poppop.
B: No, Poppop isn't Santa.
J: Mrs. Claus is married to Santa Claus. So, if Nana is Mrs. Claus than Poppop is Santa because Nana is married to Santa.
B: You can be married to more than 1 person at a time, you know. Nana can be married to Poppop and Santa at the same time.
J: No, she can't. It's against the law to be married to more than 1 person at a time.
B: Why? I don't like that law. It shouldn't be a law. You should be able to marry more than 1 person.
J: How would you feel if I was married to someone else besides daddy? You already complain that I am not here enough since I work 2 jobs. If I married someone else, too, than you'd see me even less because I'd have to spend half my time with the other husband and half my time here with you and daddy.
B: Why couldn't we all just live in the same house together?
J: Ben, I could not be in love with more than 1 man at a time and I would not marry a man I was not in love with. So, I am not going to marry another man. Besides, men do not want to share their wives with other men.
B: (He sat up and stared at me for a full minute before saying) That sounds like you don't love me if you love daddy and you can't love more than 1 man at a time.
J: That's not true, baby. I love you very much! I love you and daddy the same amount, but I love you each differently. I am in love with your daddy and I love you. It is a different kind of love between you and me than it is between a husband and a wife.
B: Oh! I didn't know that! But why don't mans want to share their wives? I'm a man and I can share so why can't mans share?
J: It's "men", not "mans". And you are not a grown man, yet. When you become a man, and you find your other half and you fall in love with that person, you'll understand why we do not want to share our spouses with others. I would not share daddy with another wife, either. And daddy does not want another wife. He's got his hands full with this one!
B: (He was quiet for a while so I thought he'd fallen asleep. Then I heard him say, quietly) Well, I still think Nana should be allowed to marry 2 different people so I could keep my Poppop and she could be Mrs. Claus.

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