SERIES: 31 Reasons The Hubs and I Have Lasted 17 Years, #15

              

#15: The hubs doe not "babysit" his own child.  

Y'all know what I mean!  You know at least one couple, or you just might be that couple, in which the father considers himself to be babysitting his own kids for his wife on that rare occasion that she goes out alone.  The wife has to leave a long list of instructions and leave her cell on, as if a neighboring  teenager was watching her kids for the 1st time.  The hubs either doesn't know how to do things, certainly not "the way Mommy does it" or pretends not to so he won't get "asked" to do this often.

Now, some of these dads are like that because they choose to be.  They feel their sole job is outside of the house and they provide the funds for the mom to keep house and take care of the kids.  But that's not always the case.  Some moms prefer to do everything, either not trusting the dad to do it her way (read: the "right" way) or she likes to/needs to be needed, depended on, the sole provider of all things organized, clean and comforting.  I think this does a terrible disservice to all members of the household.

The hubs does not feel that his contribution to parenthood stopped at conception.  When we got pregnant, he was just as excited as I was.  The hubs is adopted and knows nothing about his birth family.  B is the only blood relative he's ever met.  I know what it's like to hold your baby and marvel over the fact that I created him; he is a piece of me!  But I can't imagine the sense of completion and home the hubs must have felt when he met his first blood relative.  :o)  (OK, that just got me all verklempt.  Talk amongst yourselves.  I'll give you a topic: The Prince of Tides was not about a prince, nor tides.)

Anywho, he's been involved since day one.  He did diapers, feedings, laundry, playtime, took B with him to run errands, was the only one who could stop B from that late afternoon/early evening fussiness that caused me to walk to the floors while bouncing him and he slept in a recliner, many nights, with B on his chest because that was the only way B would asleep.  The hubs is B's most frequent playmate, they share secrets, share hobbies and go away for weekends together.  And the hubs encourages me to get out alone or with my friends, even for long weekends.  All that joy, closeness and blessings are deprived from every member of the household when one parent is not as involved as the other.

I remember one evening when B was about 6 months old.  I needed to get out and we needed groceries.  Instead of us all going, the hubs insisted I go alone.  I went to The Walmarts, my favorite place at the time, got something to eat and browsed through the clothes and housewares before starting my grocery shopping.  I am such a cheap date and happy doing these little things.  I came home and was surprised my boys were not in the living room.  I went looking for them so the hubs could help me unload the groceries.  I found then in the nursery.  The hubs was asleep in the glider rocker and B was asleep on his chest - naked.  Upon closer inspection, I noticed that the hubs shirt was soaking wet.  I woke him up and asked him what happened.  B was on the changing table and the hubs was changing his diaper and getting him into PJs for the night.  B got really upset and wouldn't stop crying.  The hubs picked up the naked B to console him but when he tried to put him back down a few times, he got hysterical again.  The hubs got tired of standing and sat down in the glider with B, who then peed all down his shirt.  The hubs didn't want to put B down and upset him again, so they stayed there and rocked and eventually fell asleep.  It's one of the hubs' fondest memories with his boy.

Don't miss any posts in this series:

31 Reasons The Hubs and I Have Lasted 17 Years, #1

31 Reasons The Hubs and I Have Lasted 17 Years, #2

31 Reasons The Hubs and I Have Lasted 17 Years, #3

31 Reasons The Hubs and I Have Lasted 17 Years, #4

31 Reasons The Hubs and I Have Lasted 17 Years, #5

31 Reasons The Hubs and I Have Lasted 17 Years, #6

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